Welcome to the Craig Van Cast - In this conversation you’re about to hear, Richmond and I pick up from where we were last in episode 12. This time, we moved into the realm of men’s work. It was such an incredible conversation; we covered role models, what the true meaning of the word PROVIDE is and then what it means to be a provider, we talked about the dance between strength and vulnerability which so many of us men have seemed to struggle with, Richmond also explains how important service and selflessness are, on the journey towards self-actualization . We also talk about the inaugural ONLINE MEN’s GATHERING that Richmond is hosting towards the end of March. There is a lot in here, if you are a man and are interested in your growth, or if you know a man that is interested in his growth. And, if you enjoy this conversation, then you’ll love episode 12 and I recommend you go give it a listen as well! Now, I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did - and a big thanks once again, to Richmond Heath.
Helpful takeaways from this podcast are the following:
- Generally, there is greater interest in women to do the healing work and to acknowledge their brokenness
- For most men, there is a culture of ignoring the body, overriding the body, Mind over matter which can help men achieve things but when it is out of balance, it often comes back and causes more harm than good.
- There is change happening. Nowadays, more western men are opening up to change. There is an uprising of men who are encouraged and supportive to be more vulnerable, to be connected to their bodies and to be in a more harmonious relationship.
- Men also suffer.
Reference (book): Myth of Male Power
Looking at statistics, men do suffer through their health, relationships, mental well being just like everybody else despite the history of power and privileges.
Reference: Podcast with Jonah Robins - he said something along the lines of “at our call, when we’re not living out of our trauma or our wounding and we’re in a relaxed physical body, and we feel good inside our body, we are naturally loving, engaged, fair, equal, harmonious-in-relationships people. This is important because being in a position of privilege and power, if we are not able to integrate that and to live in a really integrated, grounded way, we’re using that power and privilege for the benefit of all, then it can be a huge burden and it can come out of the trauma patterns in our culture.
- In the Western Culture, there is a focus on men having everything under control, having all the answers and being able to be the protector and the earner.
- Yet confusing because most of the male role models in social media are living in a way that is beyond the normal standards that has a massive detrimental effect upon men.
- In the western world, we don’t have a lot of men who are being supported for ongoing growth and development so that the older they get, the wiser they get, the more open hearted they get.
- A study was made at people all around the world who had taken deliberate action to try and make themselves feel better, happier and healthier. They found that the countries that had people feeling happier and healthier were countries that had community consciousness and took action to benefit/service others. Whereas the people who took action for their own benefit, which are primarily within Western cultures, were not. There is something fundamental about being in community, in relationship and being supportive of others that the INDIVIDUALIZED western society misses.
- PRO - FIDE - Provider of the faith, nothing to do with materialistic things.
- Men’s role is not just about providing materialistic things. It’s about providing connection to faith, to something deeper so we’re not just self-centered and looking to benefit ourselves.
- It’s often not until we’ve got a reason to heal, or a reason to change, often not until that reason is outside (i.e, a partner, children), where their motivation is not self-centered that people make extraordinary, dramatic changes like they get their life together.
- Live good lives and live like good people by overriding the unresolved stuff inside us whether it is fear or anger. We have not learned to embody and integrate and allow it to move us so we can reach resolution.
- TRE allows us to have the physiology to let go of “stuff”
Reference (Youtube Video): When The Moment Sings The Muse Within - Highly recommended by Richmond to watch and it’s about a beautiful study of cultures.
- Containment is another word for freeze or any mobility response. How often do we contain personal expressions?
- Men’s Work is an avenue or vehicle that offers a space for men to support their healing and development across their life journey.
- Your ability to cry and to let yourself be vulnerable - THAT IS YOUR GREATEST STRENGTH.
- We so often confuse “Maleness” with “Masculinity” - strength, direction, outwardness while female is being associated with softness rather than recognizing us as having the potential of being both.
- As we mature as men, the journey becomes about supporting other men to be better.
- Around the end of March - Richmond Heath is hosting an inaugural online men’s gathering.
FREE Online Men’s Gathering - 3 days filled with keynotes, workshops, sharing circles, and networking.